Tomorrow night will be crunch time for the team that is..... Clueless in Edgware.
"We" consists of Me , Pete, Heather and Dick , a quiz team renowned for their ability to come bottom of any quiz they choose to. Last time ( and , yes, it was also the first time for our heros)
the humiliation was at the school of our offspring with Heathers immortal words ringing in our ears" I dont mind not doing well as long as we dont come last"......nuff said.
Tomorrow will be different, yes, I feel it in my bones.
Good or bad different , who can say , but different.
The venue is at an old folks home , supper provided , bring your own booze.
This time we wont have our offspring with us, sulking on the table , trying to pretend they dont know us.
They were useless anyway.We made them come to answer the teenage questions on TV programs and music but they knew nothing, absolutely nothing. (or could it have been a double bluff to ensure we didnt take them again? Ah well.)
Auntie Nannette in Wales has sent us a "reminiscences" quiz book with such questions as
"Which boxer was knocked out by Rocky Marciano in 1951?" and "Which actress said I was Snow White but I drifted" Stuff like that.Ive been swotting up.
One tiny teensy little problem with this helpful little book is that it doesnt come with any answers!! Thats a load of goddamn use then isnt it?!
Thank you Auntie Nanette, thank you so bloody much! All this has succeeded in doing is freaking me out now.Letting me know exactly how much I dont know.
Our only hope lies with the luckless geriatric pair who have the misfortune to share our table.John and his wife.
I hope they've been swotting up using a book with answers!
Signing off Clueless -and -freaked -in -Edgware
Friday, 30 March 2007
Thursday, 29 March 2007
The PC problem
I think Ive cracked it! It was definitely linked to this PC upstairs...for those who are interested...and so I defragmented it, cleared the cookies and temporary internet files, changed the security settings and re entered the blogger name which is actually www2.blogger.com
now we are cooking with gas!!
Evil Bob.....Part three
Evil Bobs fall to the dark side really began one sunny day when I was busy pruning back his Leylandii hedge in my front garden.
Bob approaches me round the front gate and appraises me of his plan to apply for outline planning permission for a bung
alow to be built at the end of his garden.
"
Bob approaches me round the front gate and appraises me of his plan to apply for outline planning permission for a bung
alow to be built at the end of his garden."
Oh it wont affect you" he gaily says.
"Its only for a bungalow and so the roof will be below the level of your bathroom window."
Well, we live in a democracy, thank the lord and I had no problem with him applying but felt obliged to be honest about my feelings and so I told him that I was less than keen to have a bungalow built no less than 4 feet away from my boundary fence. We had an amicable discussion about it, honest, and then he moved off to tinker with his motorbike (something he insisted on tuning up every Sunday morning at 7.30, not that I complained but the other neighbours used to yell at him from their bedroom windows)
The self same motorbike had given him no less than three substantial insurance payouts through accidents as well as a considerable period out of work on the sick whilst moonlighting as a lorry driver.This was something else he always parked down our road.His 40 ton articulated lorry.
But
I digress...
Back to the bungalow.
I didnt think much more about it until our neighbour ,Terry , opposite, came over one night to see what we thought of the idea.
Terry and his wife would have the view from their bedroom window spoiled by this bungalow and as Terry likes to see all that transpires in Bob garden, he wasnt too keen.
Terry has reported seeing police raiding Bobs gaff on two occasions now in the wee small hours.Bob wasnt there, probably out mugging old ladies but his wife was in the garden , in her nightie, using her mobile phone.
Again...
I digress.
The bungalow..
Well, my other half and Terry got their heads together, as men do on serious occasions such as this and came up with the idea of a petition to be presented to the council.
Muggins here, agreed to take it round two local roads whilst Tel would take it to the rest.
So, some time and several hundred signatures later (except for those who were scared of Bob, I tell you no lies.) the petition was presented to the council by Terry.
Bob soon learned that he had been turned down and was not allowed to re apply for quite a while.
He was...let me say...a tad disappointed at this
From that moment on, he completely ignored us.
Just us.
No one else.
He made up his mind that we were the villains of the peace and even crossed the road rather than have to breathe our air.
He took opportunities to tell all that would listen (and pass it back to us) that we were very upset with him.
What a load of b******s!
Any way
That was the beginning of the souring....
Bob the Sith Lord
May the force leave you soon.
"Its only for a bungalow and so the roof will be below the level of your bathroom window."
Well, we live in a democracy, thank the lord and I had no problem with him applying but felt obliged to be honest about my feelings and so I told him that I was less than keen to have a bungalow built no less than 4 feet away from my boundary fence. We had an amicable discussion about it, honest, and then he moved off to tinker with his motorbike (something he insisted on tuning up every Sunday morning at 7.30, not that I complained but the other neighbours used to yell at him from their bedroom windows)
The self same motorbike had given him no less than three substantial insurance payouts through accidents as well as a considerable period out of work on the sick whilst moonlighting as a lorry driver.This was something else he always parked down our road.His 40 ton articulated lorry.
But
I digress...
Back to the bungalow.
I didnt think much more about it until our neighbour ,Terry , opposite, came over one night to see what we thought of the idea.
Terry and his wife would have the view from their bedroom window spoiled by this bungalow and as Terry likes to see all that transpires in Bob garden, he wasnt too keen.
Terry has reported seeing police raiding Bobs gaff on two occasions now in the wee small hours.Bob wasnt there, probably out mugging old ladies but his wife was in the garden , in her nightie, using her mobile phone.
Again...
I digress.
The bungalow..
Well, my other half and Terry got their heads together, as men do on serious occasions such as this and came up with the idea of a petition to be presented to the council.
Muggins here, agreed to take it round two local roads whilst Tel would take it to the rest.
So, some time and several hundred signatures later (except for those who were scared of Bob, I tell you no lies.) the petition was presented to the council by Terry.
Bob soon learned that he had been turned down and was not allowed to re apply for quite a while.
He was...let me say...a tad disappointed at this
From that moment on, he completely ignored us.
Just us.
No one else.
He made up his mind that we were the villains of the peace and even crossed the road rather than have to breathe our air.
He took opportunities to tell all that would listen (and pass it back to us) that we were very upset with him.
What a load of b******s!
Any way
That was the beginning of the souring....
Bob the Sith Lord
May the force leave you soon.
Tuesday, 27 March 2007
Please please me......and they did!
Went to Swindon on Sunday afternoon , yes thats where my cous lives. If she'll let me Ill publish her name but shes such a shy retiring soul that she may not want me to.
I had been invited to a soiree at a local house of somewhat ill repute...no Im lying.We were going to see and hear a Beatles tribute band called the Pre Fab Four who also happened to be supported by an all girl group called the Shebeats. Sophie (remember she of the daft face photos in Majorca?) had friends who played in the band and she very kindly agreed to drag her aged Aunt (me) and even more aged and wizened Mum (my cous..who is really three weeks younger than me but quite frankly looks considerably older) to see them and to sit with her and her friends while we imbibed.
We were chauffeured and thus able to drink so several whiskies and gins down the line saw and heard us singing every Beatles song they performed.
It was a magnificent evening.The bands were superb and the She beats, well , if they dont get a contract soon from some music mogul Ill starve myself of chocolate for a year!
They write all their own stuff , look and sound amazing and you can check them out on myspace/the shebeats.
Prefab four were also pretty damn good and the evening was a monumental success.
I stayed the night with my cous and then , just to continue the enjoyment we "retailed " in Swindon on Monday till we dropped. Had a great pub lunch on the way and now Im back home telling you about it.Gonna see if I can find a pic of the band on the internet. She loves you yeh yeh yeh yeh.I sure do!
I had been invited to a soiree at a local house of somewhat ill repute...no Im lying.We were going to see and hear a Beatles tribute band called the Pre Fab Four who also happened to be supported by an all girl group called the Shebeats. Sophie (remember she of the daft face photos in Majorca?) had friends who played in the band and she very kindly agreed to drag her aged Aunt (me) and even more aged and wizened Mum (my cous..who is really three weeks younger than me but quite frankly looks considerably older) to see them and to sit with her and her friends while we imbibed.
We were chauffeured and thus able to drink so several whiskies and gins down the line saw and heard us singing every Beatles song they performed.
It was a magnificent evening.The bands were superb and the She beats, well , if they dont get a contract soon from some music mogul Ill starve myself of chocolate for a year!
They write all their own stuff , look and sound amazing and you can check them out on myspace/the shebeats.
Prefab four were also pretty damn good and the evening was a monumental success.
I stayed the night with my cous and then , just to continue the enjoyment we "retailed " in Swindon on Monday till we dropped. Had a great pub lunch on the way and now Im back home telling you about it.Gonna see if I can find a pic of the band on the internet. She loves you yeh yeh yeh yeh.I sure do!
Monday, 19 March 2007
A pic of the eclipse
I tried to post this a week or so back .
A glorious pic of the moon after the recent eclipse.Taken by , yet another, cousin who is a whizz with astronomy. Enjoy all the heavenly glories.
Mothers Day
I no longer have my dear mum but I went to the cemetary to put some flowers on her grave .Always uplifts me ,strange as it may seem.
Picked my Dad up on the way back and brought him home with me.We have a routine on a Sunday.He comes over by public transport(his choice), Nick cooks breakfast and makes him fried bread , he stays about an hour and a half then I give him a lift to the station.
The boys were great (my other half was in Warwick so I know it was all their own work).They bought me a massive card reading"to the best mum in the world" big pic of a carribean island with the words" we are going to send you to the place where bananas and pineapples come from" Inside...yes..youve guessed it...TESCO!
And I got a shaking thing with glitter in it and a teddy bear that said "mum" on the outside , together with an oil burner and essential oils.So sweet.They know I love that kind of thing.
The other half came back and we went out for a meal in the evening.All booked, yippee, no cooking.
On the way to the restaurant we got "egged" by some little b******s lurking in the bushes and chucking eggs at cars. Felt like a brick hitting the car but when checked only an egg.God only knows what pleasure they derived from it.Freezing cold, snowing, dark and they had to wait alongside the mainroad until the attack.
Anyway, arrived at the restaurant...slight problem...Pete couldnt remember which restaurant he had booked for! Well, not quite true.He knew the name and its phone number but its location didnt appear to be where he thought.We then proceeded to walk the length of Hatch End high street, looking for Fellinis.Found it.Turns out it was their fault.They had moved from across the road to the new location.
All was well.
One bottle of nice chianti and a good meal later, back home , in the warm to watch 24.
I must get on with my work now!! Bad bad girl!
Picked my Dad up on the way back and brought him home with me.We have a routine on a Sunday.He comes over by public transport(his choice), Nick cooks breakfast and makes him fried bread , he stays about an hour and a half then I give him a lift to the station.
The boys were great (my other half was in Warwick so I know it was all their own work).They bought me a massive card reading"to the best mum in the world" big pic of a carribean island with the words" we are going to send you to the place where bananas and pineapples come from" Inside...yes..youve guessed it...TESCO!
And I got a shaking thing with glitter in it and a teddy bear that said "mum" on the outside , together with an oil burner and essential oils.So sweet.They know I love that kind of thing.
The other half came back and we went out for a meal in the evening.All booked, yippee, no cooking.
On the way to the restaurant we got "egged" by some little b******s lurking in the bushes and chucking eggs at cars. Felt like a brick hitting the car but when checked only an egg.God only knows what pleasure they derived from it.Freezing cold, snowing, dark and they had to wait alongside the mainroad until the attack.
Anyway, arrived at the restaurant...slight problem...Pete couldnt remember which restaurant he had booked for! Well, not quite true.He knew the name and its phone number but its location didnt appear to be where he thought.We then proceeded to walk the length of Hatch End high street, looking for Fellinis.Found it.Turns out it was their fault.They had moved from across the road to the new location.
All was well.
One bottle of nice chianti and a good meal later, back home , in the warm to watch 24.
I must get on with my work now!! Bad bad girl!
On the genetic superiority of Eastern Europeans
Saturday morning was beautiful here in sunny Uxbridge, as it has been for weeks now.Cold but clear blue skies.Just right for walking.....but that not what I did..Im rambling.
I have a polish uncle, by marriage to my Dads sister who was to be 94, yes, 94 on Sunday so I decided I should go and pay him a visit. He only lives 10 minutes away with my Aunt who is herself 84. My youngest and I went over , bearing a bottle of courvoisier.
I couldnt get one card for 94 so I decided to have a joke with him and get him 4 cards all of which added up to 94. Two had badges also, one for Darth Vader which read "obey your master" and one with a pic of bob the builder on it .(he was a carpenter by trade.)
I thought the Darth Vader was particularly appropriate because my Auntie Elsie is bossy and he could simply point at the badge.
Well, you would have thought Id given him and her a million pounds1 They thought it was SO funny and forced popcorn and brandy onto us (well, I had the brandy, Nick had the popcorn.)
He really is amazing for his age.Still gos out, with his stick, walks round to his doctor or to the shops.His mind is good , watches the news daily and reads avidly.Just his hearing going which annoys Auntie Elsie.
So, enough said, I will visit more regularly but if my Uncle Alec is anything to go by, I reckon we should encourage much interbreeding between us Anglo saxons and our Polish friends.We've got the opportunity right now, having so many immigrants.
Their gene pool is clearly superior to ours after all.
I have a polish uncle, by marriage to my Dads sister who was to be 94, yes, 94 on Sunday so I decided I should go and pay him a visit. He only lives 10 minutes away with my Aunt who is herself 84. My youngest and I went over , bearing a bottle of courvoisier.
I couldnt get one card for 94 so I decided to have a joke with him and get him 4 cards all of which added up to 94. Two had badges also, one for Darth Vader which read "obey your master" and one with a pic of bob the builder on it .(he was a carpenter by trade.)
I thought the Darth Vader was particularly appropriate because my Auntie Elsie is bossy and he could simply point at the badge.
Well, you would have thought Id given him and her a million pounds1 They thought it was SO funny and forced popcorn and brandy onto us (well, I had the brandy, Nick had the popcorn.)
He really is amazing for his age.Still gos out, with his stick, walks round to his doctor or to the shops.His mind is good , watches the news daily and reads avidly.Just his hearing going which annoys Auntie Elsie.
So, enough said, I will visit more regularly but if my Uncle Alec is anything to go by, I reckon we should encourage much interbreeding between us Anglo saxons and our Polish friends.We've got the opportunity right now, having so many immigrants.
Their gene pool is clearly superior to ours after all.
Tuesday, 13 March 2007
Error...Java?
Could the error thing be to do with the new Java update I have installed upstairs? Im writing this downstairs ...again! Only minutes ago I couldnt access the blog again and so I came downstairs.It wants me to update Java down here as well.I dont think I shall.
Evil Bob...The beginning
I really felt compelled to write this in order that Evil Bob should not be seen in a totally bad light (before I asassinate (?) his character completely). Also, this is a disgraceful displacement activity for me when I should be planning tomorrows lessons.Oh well.
Evil Bob has not always been so evil.When he moved in , with his family, a wife and grown up son, a few years ago , he replaced a much loved 90 year old lady , Jean, with whom I used to have afternoon tea and cakes and my other half would dispose of her garden rubbish and do other odd things for her. So, I admit, I was a tad disappointed that she was leaving us to live with her son.Nevertheless, I did the good neighbour thing and we spoke over the fence and at the door.No tea and cakes, wasnt his or his wifes style.
He was very chatty , if a bit Del boyish . I also dont have a problem with that.My family are all working class from Hammersmith and Acton.I know my roots and Im proud of them, including my Romany gypsy heritage.
I digress.
He gave me bay leaves, I took back his puppy who had made an escape attempt under the garden fence.Cant say I blame it. The first one was knocked down and killed by a car , outside his house in a similar bid for freedom a few months earlier.
He called and told us someone had hit the bumper of our camper van and was trying to flee the scene of his crime. Bob prevented this until we were able to attend to the matter.
I pruned his Lelandii, he pruned his own ivy growing copiously over our fence.He loaned us his long handled pruning shears to do the ornamental plum that was 20 feet high and stealing all the sun.
So, I have established his credentials.
I shall assassinate him in a later article.
Only if this damn error thingy allows it.
Dont hold your breath.
Evil Bob has not always been so evil.When he moved in , with his family, a wife and grown up son, a few years ago , he replaced a much loved 90 year old lady , Jean, with whom I used to have afternoon tea and cakes and my other half would dispose of her garden rubbish and do other odd things for her. So, I admit, I was a tad disappointed that she was leaving us to live with her son.Nevertheless, I did the good neighbour thing and we spoke over the fence and at the door.No tea and cakes, wasnt his or his wifes style.
He was very chatty , if a bit Del boyish . I also dont have a problem with that.My family are all working class from Hammersmith and Acton.I know my roots and Im proud of them, including my Romany gypsy heritage.
I digress.
He gave me bay leaves, I took back his puppy who had made an escape attempt under the garden fence.Cant say I blame it. The first one was knocked down and killed by a car , outside his house in a similar bid for freedom a few months earlier.
He called and told us someone had hit the bumper of our camper van and was trying to flee the scene of his crime. Bob prevented this until we were able to attend to the matter.
I pruned his Lelandii, he pruned his own ivy growing copiously over our fence.He loaned us his long handled pruning shears to do the ornamental plum that was 20 feet high and stealing all the sun.
So, I have established his credentials.
I shall assassinate him in a later article.
Only if this damn error thingy allows it.
Dont hold your breath.
Technicalities
Ive tied the "error" message down to
my upstairs PC
and
the time of day or night
and
possibly how long the modem has been on
and
maybe how much use is being made of the modem downstairs whilst Im up here.
The first two are the most significant.Last nights post about evil Bob was done at around 11.30 pm , downstairs,when all had gone to bed.
Now, Im up here at 12.33 pm.
Go figure.
Any more suggestions gratefully received.
my upstairs PC
and
the time of day or night
and
possibly how long the modem has been on
and
maybe how much use is being made of the modem downstairs whilst Im up here.
The first two are the most significant.Last nights post about evil Bob was done at around 11.30 pm , downstairs,when all had gone to bed.
Now, Im up here at 12.33 pm.
Go figure.
Any more suggestions gratefully received.
Monday, 12 March 2007
Evil Bob and the parking
We have a really bad parking problem down our road.Brunel university is just around the corner and they have expanded enormously but they dont provide enough parking for the students.The result is...yes...they park down the surrounding roads.That shouldnt be a problem because they do it during the day when most people are at work,but just lately , some cars are parked for the whole week, outside our house.Now we are already a three car family (I know, our carbon footprints are probably the size of bigfoot).
So, irate neighbours all around. Brunel have been told but now we have to wait for residents only parking which no one really wants.
Enough of the background.What has this to do with Evil Bob you may well ask.
No one likes the situation but I for one dont blame the students, I blame Brunel for not being more aware of the consequences of their expansion and for banning first years from parking on their campus.
But, Evil Bob, he does blame the students or at least, he gets back at them.
He has already put bollards out, I dont have a problem with that.
However, I DO have a problem with him breaking off the windscreen wipers of any car parked on his frontage and /or letting their tyres down.
Shot himself in the foot a week ago because he made the front two types flat of one car and it stayed there for three weeks.
Surprising?
No.
Most students cant afford one tyre let alone two.
I have more to say about evil Bob , apart from his picking on students.
Watch this space and I will blacken his character further.
I get on well with the neighbors, honest.
But Evil Bob, well hes something else!!
So, irate neighbours all around. Brunel have been told but now we have to wait for residents only parking which no one really wants.
Enough of the background.What has this to do with Evil Bob you may well ask.
No one likes the situation but I for one dont blame the students, I blame Brunel for not being more aware of the consequences of their expansion and for banning first years from parking on their campus.
But, Evil Bob, he does blame the students or at least, he gets back at them.
He has already put bollards out, I dont have a problem with that.
However, I DO have a problem with him breaking off the windscreen wipers of any car parked on his frontage and /or letting their tyres down.
Shot himself in the foot a week ago because he made the front two types flat of one car and it stayed there for three weeks.
Surprising?
No.
Most students cant afford one tyre let alone two.
I have more to say about evil Bob , apart from his picking on students.
Watch this space and I will blacken his character further.
I get on well with the neighbors, honest.
But Evil Bob, well hes something else!!
In praise of Nick
My youngest said" just refresh the page"
Having done all the complicated things including posting a message for help and rebooting and making sure I had my updates...I couldnt quite believe it would be that simple but..out of the mouths of babes...or could it be that I just cant see the wood for the trees sometimes?!
Off now to give the hero a lift to school.
Having done all the complicated things including posting a message for help and rebooting and making sure I had my updates...I couldnt quite believe it would be that simple but..out of the mouths of babes...or could it be that I just cant see the wood for the trees sometimes?!
Off now to give the hero a lift to school.
Ahhh, it must be something to do with my PC upstairs!
Well, here I am posting at last but as its 1am Im going to bed! The error I keep getting is obviously something to do with my other PC which is a pain because this one is used all the time by the two terrors!
Ill try and work it out.
see ya
yawwwwwnn!
Ill try and work it out.
see ya
yawwwwwnn!
Friday, 2 March 2007
of boobs and bees......
Just felt like sharing this....went for a mammogram today..just routine. Boy , is it painful?!
Only other woman will be able to relate to this, having your boobs squashed flat to about a centimetre between two metal plates. Phew! I know it was worthwhile but surely in this day and age there could be a better less painful way? OK, Ill stop moaning.Im lucky it gets done routinely under the NHS.
and...what is making those American bees abandon their hives and die?
der der der der, (twilight zone music)
Ta ra for now.Off to get some vino and watch pop idol.
Only other woman will be able to relate to this, having your boobs squashed flat to about a centimetre between two metal plates. Phew! I know it was worthwhile but surely in this day and age there could be a better less painful way? OK, Ill stop moaning.Im lucky it gets done routinely under the NHS.
and...what is making those American bees abandon their hives and die?
der der der der, (twilight zone music)
Ta ra for now.Off to get some vino and watch pop idol.
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