Of moscows mules , Tennyson Down and the Great wall of China

YARMOUTH IOW

A VERY OLD VIEW OF ORCHARD STORES

aka Arkwrights to us.

Its been a while since I blogged, apologies to my hundreds of readers, millions of publishers and positively billions of film producers falling over themselves and drooling with anticipation at the film that could be made of this blog........uh? where am I ?? .......sorry ...in my dreams...



Anyway, time for an update. As my loyal follower(s) and friend(s) know, the Isle of Wight, that lovely little piece of England where time stood still for 30 years before it caught up again, is visited on a yearly basis by yours truly and the gang ..aka the 2x4's (dont ask).

FIELD HOUSE IOW

This year is no exception and Mucky, Legs, BJ and Stubb wended (?) their way to the ferry at Lymington last Saturday lunchtime. Alisson and Jim, our long suffering hosts, were pre warned of our imminent arrival. In fact they agreed to us staying for another 4 days in spite of the fact that they knew exactly what to expect.Well, not EXACTLY because our gang thrives on doing at least one more ridiculous thing every year. Nevertheless, we had not been shunned by these generous folk , although we would not have been surprised to find a note on the door saying they had moved to unknown climes.



A wonderful ferry crossing, brilliant blue skies , no rain or Tsunamis and a great walk to Freshwater to our wonderfully luxurious and welcoming home for 4 days which also must have the most comfortable beds in the world.Im sure the mattress is filled with the down , hand plucked from the backs of extinct dodos or some such creature. This is essential as BJ and I share a bed (we've been together long enough so its allowed) and we are two magnificent specimens of womanhood with a combined tonnage of around 100 .Having a bed that doesnt even move when one gets out is superb.

FRESHWATER BAY

Check out the link to Field House, Pound Green, IOW, in my "chains"
Wondrous food with Jim as a most solicitous host and Alisson being very indulgent with us and we were set for the four days. We had a quiz, raced butterflies and laughed loads, I DO mean loads.

Tennyson down was as beautiful as ever and we managed to squeeze in a cream tea. We got caught in a 10minute downpour on Afton Down, the abiding memory of which will be Mucky attempting to get Legs into her see through plastic poncho that was really nothing more than a very large polythene bag whilst the wind flapped it everywhere and BJ watched in the shelter of the tea shop thinking "oh there they are, poor loves" Yes, thats ALL she did! Not rush out to rescue us or anything . I know it would have been futile but...thats not the point!

We met up with another resident of Alisson and Jims, a very jolly lady called Jean.Well, she was jolly by the time we left.I think the poor woman had been seeking some peace but she made the mistake of booking the same time us us which then made peace unattainable.

She did say she enjoyed it and that laughter was the best medicine,.I still cant help feeling she may have been a tad overwhelmed!
Food at the Vine , the local pub , was the order of most evenings. One evening was spent at the Fatima tandoori where the waiter steadfastly refused to acknowledge that he remembered us.Im sorry, but I just cant believe that we havent made such an impression over the five years that he didnt at least want a one way ticket back to Pakistan! Anyway, the food was great.

The greatest evening was indeed spent in the Vine at the Monday night quiz.Our illustrious hosts and , by this time, totally overwhelmed Jean, came with us and it made the evening all the more special. We ate there again , with great food except that Jean had to eat a beef madras, thinly disguised as a chicken balti.I dont think her stomach will ever be the same!

We thought thatAlisson was fraternising with the enemy at one point but it turns out that she knew some people down there. Jim kept his own council.We did OK except for one or two dodgy answers that we really wanted to dispute like the Great wall of China being 160 km long ...well give or take a few thousand Jim said! This and the 10 correct answers given by some cheating residents (they were using their mobile to access the internet.) to an impossible snowball when clearly they were in the shallow end of the gene pool (not my comment but from one of our group who shall remain nameless) made Jim cross and he turned from quiet scotsman into BRAVEHEART!

We will get them next year, never fear Jim!
Im running out of steam and superlatives but thanks guy(s) and gals, it was quite an adventure yet again. It gets better every year. Watch out for the pics.Ill post them when I can. Hasta la vista IOW.

BALLYBUNTAL...dohh! Why didnt I know that?!

Sunday afternoon...and I should be doing something else!

This is so addictive! Ive just spent an hour answering emails and going onto my facebook account and commenting on others. I really should be doing something else like ironing or cleaning. Yawwwnn! Anyway, a little update.
A really sadistic device, an electronic fly killer was purchased the other day.I wasnt impressed and I said so.However, Ive just spent another 10minutes using the damn thing.
Now the house is filled with the aroma of frying invertebrates, along with roast lamb.
I need forgiveness again I think.

Away for the weekend

Helen and I found a flyer at Pilates advertising a "Folk and Ale " weekend down near Waterlooville in Hampshire.

Oh yes, what fun, lets go and ...camp!

CLOUDS ON THE WAY DOWN

So , campsite booked at the princely sum of £6, we prepared to go.

Then, flash flood warnings, dire weather conditions and an executive decision was made to go bed and breakfast, thank God!

OUR ROOM

Helen drove down (my car is being mended from a crash but Ill write about that in another post).

We arrived at around 10pm and , all I can say is that the "village hall" appeared to be a nissan hut with approximately two and a half people in it.No, I lie, three people.

Convulsed with hysterical laughter would not be an exaggeration.We were unable to leave the car for fear of wetting our knickers but eventually we ventured forth.

Janet and I had been in touch by email and she made us very welcome. As we stepped into the throng of revellers we were bowled over by the exciting buzzing atmosphere and ambience...no, thats not right, oh yes, there was no atmosphere or throng of revellers, simply very very aged villagers (think duelling banjos here) listening intently to unaccompanied , finger in the ear folk singing of the " when we went down the mine and got blown up and everyone died and the ship sank at sea and Jenny lost her maidenhead"...etc etc.

A RIVER IN THE GROUNDS


Occasionally someone played a guitar and we heard snippets of Ewan Mcoll type folk music which was great but mostly it was damn depressing and mind numbingly boring.However, how could we leave with Janet being so nice?

We also met up with Arthur who also welcomed us but had a rather bizarre way of sidling over unexpectedly and revealing snippets of totally inappropriate gossip throughout the evening such as " see that one over there? Last time I saw her she was a man" and stuff like that.
Unfortunately for him, he revealed this shocking information to Helen who really was no fun and nodded wisely saying" yes, its very difficult for people"

That wasnt what Arthur wanted.I knew that.If only he had made his revelation to me I would have responded in a much more tabloid way with " Oh my God! You cannot be serious! How can you BEAR to be in the same room as him? etc etc" But no, he stuck to Helen , revealing more and more which simply drove her deeper and deeper into understanding social worker/liberal bleeding heart mode.The advantage of this was of course that he soon gave up all attempts to shock and sidled off to boil a baby.


We stayed as long as was polite and then got off to the hotel.At least the beer was good.

The room was somewhat like a chalet.Look at the pics.All ok except we had no hot water for the whole two days. We did get a discount.Watched a bit of Glastonbury , had some wine then hit the sack.
Next day, Helen and I practised a Steel eye span song, the Drunkard. This was with a view to singing it at the evenings revelries.Yes, we were going back.

SOME OF THE GARDEN

I was really impressed with Helen.She had never heard the song before but managed to learn all the words and the tune.

We went back, suffered more finger in the ear stuff and chorus songs.One of them sounded like it was praising paedophiles but it may have just been the way we interpreted it!

And some old biddy told some god awful story , using props like soap and jif and Mr Sheen to make it funny which it wasnt.I tried so hard to look interested but Helen said I didnt succeed.

We sang our song, the highlight of the evening, and it went down well.Then Helen one two raffle prizes, one which was a joint of meat and as her and her whole family are vegetarian , she told them what to do with it ...no...not really....told them to give it to someone else.

The weekend was really a great laugh and I thoroughly enjoyed it, but not for the folk singing.I think Helen did too.Cant wait for next year.

We wont be going, unless its to see if Arthur has had a sex change.

Hero with feet of clay

I think I must have been an ostrich at some point in the late sixties , early seventies.

My all time favourite group has to be Cream.Remember? Ginger Baker, Jack Bruce and the legendary best guitarist ever (possibly closely followed by George Harrison) Eric Clapton.

I still love their music.Rock n Roll at its best.And I still love Claptons guitar.

But... I was listening to some rock history prog on the radio whilst driving and they were talking about the origins of the rock against racism movement.Apparently, it was started as a backlash to the comments made by my dear Eric at one of his gigs effectively saying that Enoch Powell was right and making very racist comments all through the concert.The papers reviled him the next day and various musicians wrote him and open letter saying, Hey Eric.Where would you and your music be without black soul , R and B and Blues?

Where indeed Eric?

I was shaken to discover that this hero of mine, who is still of course a tremendous musician, should hold views that are so opposed to my own.

Mind you, that was 40 years ago.

Maybe hes changed.

Feet of clay.

Why am I surprised?

Lest we forget that we were young once

I have a collection of well over 300 vinyl records and was excited to have delivered yesterday, an Ion turntable with USB connector so that I can put all my vinyls onto CD.

I , of course, got involved in listening to and reminiscing over old records.

I came across the collection of Bob Dylans , someone whose voice I never reckoned.I always thought that anyone else sang Dylan songs better than Dylan but he is a mean writer of lyrics.

Couldnt resist printing some lyrics , written in the sixties but still as relevant today.

Come gather round people wherever you roam

And admit that the waters around you have grown

And accept it that soon youll be drenched to the bone

If your time to you is worth saving

Youd better start swimming or youll sink like a stone

For the times they are a changin.

Come senators and congressmen please heed the call

Dont stand in the doorway dont block up the hall

For he who gets hurt will be he who has stalled

The battle outside is raging

Itll soon shake your windows and rattle your walls

For the times they are a changin

Come mothers and fathers throughout the land

Dont criticise what you cant understand

Your sons and your daughters are beyond your command

Your old road is rapidly fading

Just get out of the new one if you cant lend a hand

For the times they are a changin

We all need reminding .Thankyou Bob.

Is it just me or.........?

Outraged yet again today.
A man who had been charged with molesting boys in his choir/orchestra received a sentence of 4years today.
The judge said the sentence was light because , since committing the offences he(the man not the judge) had married and had children of his own. He was also safe to work with children, the judge said.
Oh, thats all right then.
!!!!!!!!

Extraordinary rendition, aka, human rights violations

I know Im feeling better because things are beginning to outrage me again.Like mans inhumanity to man and stuff like that. I need to make it plain right now that this piece is not an attack on America or its people , just its current administration in the shape of Dubya junior with whom our lord and master , Tony, had such a good relationship.

I must be very slow to catch on because Ive only been made aware of this "Extraordinary Rendition " thing by the program on TV.

Outraged doesnt begin to describe how I felt.

Ive always seen Guantanamo and Abu Ghraib as despicable when the US is supposed to be "civilised" and yet the Bush administration condones and encourages the torture of prisoners held without trial. With the acceptance Im sure of the British government.

The motto being "Dont get caught"

But I foolishly thought things were getting better.Then I heard about Khalid El Nasri , an innocent German citizen, and his terrible experiences.No justice even now for him and he has just been admitted to a psychiatric hospital.

Countries in Europe also in league with the CIA over this.

Im rambling now.

I just want it to stop. All the torture and the lies and the inhumanity.

Maybe Ill join Amnesty.